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  Sat 13th September, 2003 Dr Martens Premier League  
Hinckley United 2 - 1 Welling United
Hinckley:
01 Whittle
02 Cartwright
03 Lenton
04 Crowley (Dyer 60mins)
05 Penny
06 Stone
07 Storer
08 Jackson
09 Lewis
10 Smith (Jenkins 73mins)
11 Murray (Dyer 69mins)
Welling:
1. Knight
2. Standen
3. McGowen (Powell 90mins)
4. Henry
5. O'Shea
6. Slatter
7. Riviere
8. Fowler
9. Jinadu
10. Booth
11. Berkeley
Goals:
Smith, 45mins 1 - 0
Berkeley, 64mins 1 - 1
Lewis, 90mins 2 - 1
 
Half Time: 1 - 0
Full Time: 2 - 1
 
the Hird Dimension:
and she's riding that stairlift to heaven Hello my darlings, well from my stairlift in heaven I've been looking down on you all, and in particular that lovely football team in red & blue. Me and Jimi Hendrix love a bit of 'knitting' of an evening and we really can't wait for Geri Halliwell to join us for a threesome. Knit one, Perl one, deary. So we thought what better way to pass our time than to follow the Knitter's football team.
There isn't that lovely, then.
Hello again my little petals, now then Welling made the trip to Middlefield Lane for this match and I know a bit about them. Now even I turned over Songs of Praise to watch the World Cup semi final of Italia 90. Harry Secombe wasn't very happy, a rugby man you see, but I watched it with all the other choir boys. "So what", you say, well Paul Parker the manager of Welling United scored England's first goal in that game. I remember it well, he got the ball with his back to goal and chipped it over the German keeper, erm somebody Shilton I think. I couldn't understand why the choir boys were throwing the hymn books at the TV but I ran round the vestry with my under skirt over my head. Wild times. Anyway back to the game. Paul Parker was bringing his Chelmsford City Welling United team to Hinckley.
Hinckley started on the attack from the whistle, within the first 10 minutes that lovely young man Neil Cartwright had put in a deep cross for Matt Lewis to try a bicycle kick, only to spectacularly shank thin air, and Dave Crowley had a 30 yard shot just over the bar. Stuart Storer had to be alert to cut out the threat after Andy Penny was careless at the back, before Leon 'KoJack' Jackson had a 20 yard shot which Glen Knight held onto in the Welling goal. Hinckley should then have had a penalty, Chris Smith got to the line and pulled the ball back for KoJack in the area. Jackson started running across the area dodging one tackle but falling under another. Jimi said to me it looked like a penalty but the referee obviously didn't agree with the stoned, dead rock star as he waved play on. Still Hinckley pushed forward, from a free kick Dave Crowley pushed the ball through to the inside of the area and Chris Smith turned and had a low shot well saved by Knight. Then from a another Cartwright cross, ooh bless that lad, Andy Penny's glancing header drifted wide of the goal. Penny was then guilty of some very casual defending which let in Welling's Jinadu, but his low blistering goal bound shot was brilliantly saved by Tommy Whittle. Now my young man Neil Cartwright had been pushing forward and crossing unhindered all afternoon. So it was no surprise when Tom McGowen decided to stop him going forward with a pick axe. Harry Secombe was right when he said he'd never get into heaven doing things like that. The ref must've heard him and McGowen received a yellow card. As the first half was almost over Glen Knight's bad clearance fell to Matt Lewis who went round a defender and saw his shot well saved. Knight couldn't hold onto the swerving ball though and Chris Smith followed up to give Hinckley a well deserved lead. Jimi's thoughts were that Hinckley had dominated the game so far but failed to punish Welling enough. It should have been 3-0 to Hinckley, but whilst it was still only 1-0 there was always a chance for Welling.
Welling started the second half with more purpose and came forward with more numbers. They began to have more possession but Hinckley's defence was holding firm and not really giving any good chances. That changed bizarrely on 64 minutes. A Welling cross seemed under hit and bobbled into the area, Whittle had dived to save the initial cross which never reached him as the ball hit the shins of Austin Berkeley and ended up in the back of the net for the equaliser. This lifted Hinckley who seemed to have sat on their lead. Justin Jenkins was brought on and his fresh legs upset the balance of the game. He had a superb run with the ball into the area, past three defenders, but his shot was well saved by Knight. Then Knight produced the save of the match. From a corner Wayne Dyer was unmarked on the far post, where he volleyed from 6 yards out. Glen Knight somehow managed to get across his goal and turn it away for a corner. Then into stoppage time Hinckley got the winner they really deserved. KoJack chipped the ball over the Welling defence and Matt Lewis nipped in to head the ball over the stranded keeper and win the game for Hinckley, 2-1 with the last kick of the game.
Overall Jimi thought Hinckley played well, though he thinks they were too deep in the first half and should've played forward as a unit and make their possession count for more. In the second half he thought Hinckley sat off Welling allowing them to get back in the game, but once Jenkins was on they started to get into attacking positions again and deserved the win overall.

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